Strap yourselves in ladies and gentlemen, you're in for a helluva read that will make you question are we living in real life or just a part of some fucked up twisted fantasy.
To those who aren't aware of what Sex Island is - it is essentially a four day bender that lets 30 male guests access to unlimited booze, sex and drugs for the admission price of 4,500 pounds ($8,800 NZD), at a private beach resort on Venezuela's Margarita Island.
It happened just last weekend, and a guest from this year's trip - a married dentist from New York called "Ryan" - kept a diary that tracked all the raunchy and debacherous activities that happened from start to finish.
In an exclusive story with The Mirror, Ryan gives us a glimpse behind the curtain at what happens at Sex Island.
Warning - the below content is going to get pretty explicit and quite frankly, fucked up. It is not Ryan's diary entries, it's our editor's written summary of what happened, and we're not going to go into every detail - you can read the full article over on The Mirror - but we'll share enough to give you an idea of what went on.
Friday 14 December
A midday start sees all the guests jump on to a yacht headed for Sex Island. Ryan describes that the guests were nervous, but as he went last year #horndog and is now a seasoned vet, he knew what to do.
I sneaked in quickly and chose the best-looking two girls, who'll be my companions for the next four days.
He then shares how he took them to a room downstairs on the yacht to get down to business.
Fast forward to later that evening, after arriving to his hotel and having a nap, Ryan and his two girls went to the restaurant for a buffet dinner with the other guys. It was one of the other guests' birthday, so he got sprung a lapdance from all the girls.
Later that night, the DJ got half the girls on stage for lesbian sex show. Then things escalated - quickly.
This guy called Samuel, the macho man in the group, got up and started having sex with the girls. Slowly almost everyone, including me, started having sex in the club. Huge orgy. I did so much drugs that I blacked out after that.
Fucking hell. This shit is straight out of, well, Rog's browsing history.
Saturday 15 December
Ryan says his Saturday didn't start until 1pm, when he woke up. Guess having a drink-and-drug-fuelled evening of sex will do that to you.
An "orgy golf tournament" was organised for that afternoon, where the winner of the golf comp got to have "all 100 girls for 15 minutes".
The afternoon was capped off with a topless salsa class, which apparently was too boring for Ryan.
I thought it was a little boring, so I convinced my friend Samuel to come to my room with his girls and mine to have a mini orgy. We took some pictures to remember it, although I’ll have to hide them so my wife doesn’t find them!
Wow, Ryan is quite the piece of shit isn't he.
Sunday 16 December
Sunday started the same as Saturday - waking up after midday after a night of sex and orgies.
Sunday afternoon saw the guests play strip tennis with the girls and take some jetskis out for a blat. And yes you guessed it, the girls were topless.
His diary updates end on Sunday evening, ahead of his last night on the island. He shares that drugs had turned up and things were getting rowdy, and "who knows what's going to happen?"
Well, shit we don't know mate. And we don't think we want to, either.