Last month, a 22-year-old Scotsman made international headlines after getting his wanger bitten off by a dog.
The police found the bloke on Ocotber 7th in a pool of his own blood. The dog was taken to police kennels. The man's appendage could not be reattached.
The bloke was left in a coma for weeks, but is allegedly awake, recovering in hospital and helping police with their investigation.
When we first heard about this story, we were all wondering what he was doing with his dick out, alone with a dog in the first place, but recent news would insinuate he was actually baiting the English Bulldog.
A source told The Times the silly bugger not only had his dick out for the taking, he'd smeared his piece in peanut butter.
Which is like every good boy's kryptonite.
Sadly, the dog's been put down since the incident.. Sounds like they put down the wrong party.
Nobody's been charged with any offence yet.