Funny Shit

'I'll fking knock you out': Aussie geezers have a nuts screaming match at golf course

One of the most Australian videos to ever exist.
8 December 2022 12:27PM

Some Aussie battlers are going viral for absolutely going off on each other while playing a round of golf and displaying an almost impressive array of swear words while doing it.

The high-intensity altercation came during the club championship at Cranbourne Golf Club. Championship golf can be TENSE, but these geezers need to learn a thing or two about keeping calm. 

It all starts when one geezer - who we later find out is 61 years old - rushes up to the golfers playing ahead of him screaming his dislike for the spectators. Then a red shirt-wearing bloke comes storming up to the anti-fan man, telling him to shut his mouth, threatening to fuck him up, and looking very tempted to take his fellow golfer’s offer of “having a crack.”

Honestly, the whole video is one of the most batshit Australian pieces of media I’ve ever witnessed and I’m so happy that I did. 

We do find out that the original geezer who started the match may have been committing the golfing sin of ‘hitting up’ i.e. when you start playing a hole even though the team ahead of you isn’t done, thus putting that team in danger of being smacked with a golf ball. 

Anyway, that ‘hitting up’ may have led to the most “c*nts”, “fucks”, “shits”, and “assholes” ever packed into a two-minute ‘conversation’. 

And there’s even more. 

After the two groups got separated, it is our accused hitter-upper’s turn to calm down and play some actual golf. Unfortunately, the geezer is more heated than an Australian outback. 

Judging by his heated reaction I’m gonna guess he absolutely whiffed that shot. Unlucky mate. 

Who knows who was in the wrong in this altercation? All I know is that we are better off for having watched it.