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Dying man hires 'coffin confessor' to crash funeral, call out 'mate' for trying to bang wife

"I stand up and announce that his best mate's got to sit down and shut up or bugger off.”
15 November 2022 12:34PM

Calling out your best mate is never easy, and it’s even harder when you’re dead. Luckily, there’s a guy out there who you can pay to crash your funeral and let it rip on your ‘mates’.

Bill Edgar is an Australian private investigator turned ‘coffin confessor’ and he went on an Aussie talk show to share the time someone hired him to go to his funeral and call out his best mate for trying to sleep with his wife. 

Appearing on Insight, Bill said he was working with a client, his first of this nature, called Graham who was nearing death. The two started talking about death, funerals and everything they entail. 

This is when Bill told Graham that he’d be happy to go to his funeral on his behalf, including one specific request. 

“I suggested I crash his funeral for him and he took me up on the offer,” he told host Kumi Taguchi. “He wanted me to out his best mate for trying to sleep with his wife while he was on his death bed.” 

“He also asked me to remove three people from the congregation that he hadn’t seen in years, so why were they paying their respects now when they could have seen him when he was alive.”

Fair play to the dead bloke, if your supposed 'mate' has pulled some crook shit like that, why not call him out in front of everyone? When Bill laid down the law at the funeral, he said people were gobsmacked at what he was doing, which is understandable.

“I mean, I'm interrupting a funeral. You have loved ones sitting there and grieving and his best mate's performing a eulogy and I stand up, interrupt the funeral service and announce that his best mate's got to sit down and shut up or bugger off.”

If you’ve got some beef you wanna settle once you’re gone, Bill said he charges anywhere from AU$2,000 (NZ$2,200) to AU$10,000 (NZ$10,995) for his services.