Funny Shit

Fireworks display cancelled after walrus shows up and starts masturbating

You don't read that everyday.
23 January 2023 12:08PM

There are many reasons for events to be cancelled, but a wanking walrus usually isn’t one. 

A fireworks display was cancelled in a UK town on New Year’s Eve after a walrus decided it was the perfect time to give himself a low-five.

We’re not sure how we missed this earlier in the year (probably because we don’t tend to search for this sort of thing), but good ol’ Mulls brought the story to the table this morning for his ‘Around The World’ segment.

According to British Divers Marine Life Rescue, the walrus, nicknamed “Thor”, showed up at a boat ramp at Scarborough Harbour around 11.30pm on December 30th. It was hoped Thor would leave the harbour before the fireworks display the following evening, but as news spread that there was a walrus in town, thousands of people came to see him. 

The locals clearly made Thor feel at home, because he made sure to put a show on for them. Have a watch of that below if you want, you weirdo.

Thor decided to stay in town the following day, so officials cordoned him off and decided to cancel the fireworks display to leave him undisturbed. Wildlife experts suggest he was “taking a break” before heading north. 

Have a watch of The Morning Rumble chatting about it all up top.