Funny Shit

The largest shit recorded in history belonged to a sick Viking from over 1,000 years ago

Make sure you're not eating when you read this one.

We hope you’re not eating dinner because you’re about to learn about the biggest piece of shit ever - and no, it's not anyone you think it is. 

The year is 1972. Archaeologists are digging a big hole in the Lloyd’s Bank area in York, England when they made a crappy discovery. 

They found a coprolite - a fancy word for a shit that’s been fossilized - that measured 20cm long and 5cm wide.

After analysing it, researchers discovered that the stool had been pooped out by some poor Viking bloke over 1000 years ago, between the years 875 - 954. 

We pity the man that had to push that behemoth through. 

Dr Andrew Jones, a history buff and former employee of the York Archaeological Trust said in 1992 that the piece of shit was, well the shit. 

It is the most exciting piece of excrement I’ve ever seen.

“In its own way, it is as irreplaceable as the [British Monarch’s] Crown Jewels," he told the Wallstreet Journal, later reported by The Viking Herald

Wow, we kind of feel bad for the guy the shit belonged to, he should be in the history books.

Part of its value comes from the fact that historians could discover what the pooping Viking’s diet was. 

They found out that he would’ve been eating a lot of bread and meat. Unfortunately for the bloke, they also discovered a bunch of parasitic eggs which meant he suffered from intestinal worms.

Eventually, the prized poo was put on display in a museum. That was until some nosey visitors, for some reason, picked it up.

They ended up dropping it, probably because they realised they were holding literal shit, and it broke into three pieces. 

Instead of flushing it down the world’s biggest toilet, the people at the Jórvik Viking Centre in York took it in 2008 and that is where it has lived ever since.

We hope you’ve enjoyed this story. If you think you’ve done a bigger crap than this, keep it to yourself thanks.